Thoughts in a Jar

I wish I could put all of my thoughts in a jar. I think too much. Thinking too much causes me to over think and analyze things that I don't want to deal with. It gets too much for me to handle and I panic. I shut down and go to war with myself. I'm tired. I'm sick of being tired. I don't always like who I am, but I have to live with it. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm tired of feeling sad. Sick of wanting things and people that I can't have.
Some days I wake up and I just feel so empty, so alone, so invisible, and so completely dissatisfied with who I am. My heart feels lonely. Everything feels so meaningless.
There are times when you're just broken into pieces. You don't even feel lime you still exist. Why are we so fragile? Some people just continue to stay with what hurts them the most. At the end of the day, I guess no one wants to feel empty inside. Maybe, that's why some people find moving on so hard.
Something that has hurt you once will usually hurt you again...
I just want to finally be a peace with myself and lock up these thoughts.

Gobble Gobble Birthday

Happy Belated Thanksgiving Bloggers and People who just Read!

I have been out of town for the past week or so and I decided that I would rather spend time with family I don't get to see very often instead of blog. Sorry..

However.. I think that this was a very successful Thanksgiving/Birthday. (: Yes ladies and gents, I turned 16 last week. Whoop!! Of course I feel or look no different.. but I can drive soon so that's pretty awesome.

Me before and after Thanksgiving/Birthday:

Yeah... exaggerating? Maybe.. :P

Well I hope you had a great Thanksgiving break and you stuffed your face with plenty of turkey and dressing and cranberry sauce. (: See you all tomorrow! I have a timed writing to prepare for... ew.

A Drop in the Bucket

Today I took a step back and looked at my life so far. (if you've never done this I recommend it.) Here I am.. I'll be 16 tomorrow and what have accomplished? What am I going to do after high-school.. And then after college?
The plan I had up until today was finish top of my class, go to college, graduate and become successful, get married, be a parent, et cetera. But how will I make a difference? What will I spend this oxygen I'm breathing on? Everything that I have listed is great to accomplish.. But it's so easy to get lost in it all.
I am already bored of the routines. You know what I'm talking about. Wake up around the same time, get ready for school, spend 7 hours memorizing and spiting out information, come home, do homework, spend a little time relaxing, sleep and repeat 5 times a week, 9 months a year for 12 or more years of our life. I ready to spice it up a bit. I am ready to have something to do all of this for.
I have always wanted to be apart of thing that are bigger than myself, and that has greatly influenced the choices I have made in the past few days. Every epidemic, every problem, every cause, you name and I want to help. Most of the time however, I have been unable or I just don't know how. Well I think I know now.
So as of today here is the plan:
After high-school I want to go on to college and then proceed to medical school. Yes ladies and gentleman, I want to be a doctor. (Don't ask me what kind, because I haven't decided.)
Then after getting my degree and the job of course, (I haven't quite worked out the specifics..and I don't know how it will all work out..) I want to volunteer 2 years of life.. At least.. To the Peace Corp. I want to help. Whatever happens during or after that.. Well it happens.
I'm just so excited about life right now and the fact that just the mere thought of helping people in my life gives me such pleasure makes me think that I'm making the right choice.. That this is what I should do with my life.

In Desperate Need of a Sorting Hat!

So I guess the Harry Potter movie premiere tonight (tomorrow morning) has influenced my Pre-Sleep thoughts. I can't help but wonder what house I would be in... or if I would even go to Hogwarts.. Would I have been a muggle? a pure breed? half muggle? or something even more bizarre like a Vella..? I wish I could find out somehow but so far the quizzes I have taken online have either been extremely stupid or my results come back tied. What I mean is that I answer and my result is 35% Slytherin, 35% Gryffindor, and 30% Ravenclaw. (Depending on the quiz, Ravenclaw takes the place of Slytherin or Gryffindor)

So that doesn't answer anything. Darn. I guess I shall never truly know.

By the way.. I am sooo excited about this new movie! Whoop! Can't believe it's finally out. (:

And So It Goes

Oh Bob. :/

In every heart there is a room
A sanctuary safe and strong
To heal the wounds from lovers past
Until a new one comes along

I spoke to you in cautious tones
You answered me with no pretense
And still I feel I said too much
My silence is my self defense

And every time I've held a rose
It seems I only felt the thorns
And so it goes, and so it goes
And so will you soon I suppose

But if my silence made you leave
Then that would be my worst mistake
So I will share this room with you
And you can have this heart to break

And this is why my eyes are closed
It's just as well for all I've seen
And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows

So I would choose to be with you
As if the choice were mine to make
But you can make decisions too
And you can have this heart to break

And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows

-Billy Joel

Home

smiling faces,

warmth and belonging,

support with no limitations,

that's Home.

cold walls that hide me,

hard floors holding me down,

absent of life,

a House.

tired of words,

of justifications,

let's just go back,

take me Home.

Wishing for Rain..

To set the mood
Of despair and anguish.
Wishing for Thunder
To conceal my screams.
Wishing for Understanding.

Halfway to 100

Yay.. 50th post... I wish that I could celebrate, but I'm afraid I am way to frustrated and upset for that. I can't be mad though because it isn't anyone's fault but my own.

I shouldn't have let it get this far.. I shouldn't care. The thing is.. I did and I do.

"It started out with a feeling,

which then grew into a hope,

which then turned into a quite thought,

which then turned into a quiet word...

And then that word grew louder,

and louder,

till it was a battle cry..."

That was me last year with Bob. If you remember (I could never forget).. it started just like the song above starts. I started to feel differently around him.. then I started hope that something happened between us.. then I started to think about us.. I got to the point where I could admit that I liked him to myself.. then to my friends until finally I told him.

Obviously though that didn't work at all.. he's too busy dating girls that don't even go to our school to notice me.. I'm just the good friend. I got so frustrated with the whole situation that I completely gave up on the friendship as a whole.

Gradually though, I got over him, and I got used to us just being friends. I came back when he needed me.

"I'll come back

When you call me

No need to say goodbye."

Of course the moment I'm over it he asks if I would be interested in just going on a date with him. I wouldn't be his girlfriend, we would just go to them movies and see what happens.

(Never happened)

Well, I didn't really care and so we became best friends more or less.

"Just because everything's changing

doesn't mean it's never

been this way before.

All you can do is try to know

who your friends are

as you head off to the war."

Then I found out that I was moving and he was there, along with all of my other friends, to help me. Besides the move there was the whole Jordan event. I lost one "friend" but gained better ones that have all been great this past month.

"You'll come back

When it's over

No need to say goodbye."

(I will be visiting this summer)

"Now we're back to the beginning

It's just a feeling and no one knows yet

But just because they can't feel it too

Doesn't mean that you have to forget.

Let your memories grow stronger and stronger

Till they're before your eyes"

I started liking him again... It was a stupid thing to do, but I couldn't control it. I tried to stop, to tell my heart to stop, but I continued to gradually like him all over again. Nothing would have happened.. because I'm moving.. so why even bother. Deep down I'm starting to think that I'm a masochistic and I just enjoy putting myself through pain. Why else would I let myself do this?

What's killing me now is that he's dating yet another girl that doesn't go to our school and not only that but she was one of my closest friends..

There are just so many questions running chaotically through my head..

Why her? How did this happen? Why do I even like him? What's wrong with me? What does she have that I don't?

It's that last one that I think about the most..

I love her but I am a better singer, I do better in school, I see him more, I talk to him more.. but then.. she may be prettier, she's a better dancer, she may be nicer, she may need him more, I may be too controlling, I may not be popular enough, I'm not athletic enough....

She was loved by everyone and on the dance team and I am just a choir nerd. That's why.

I'm am and will forever be the friend.

And no matter how much I say I hate him.. If he ever called me.. I would come running back every time..

"You'll come back

When they call you

no need to say goodbye."

Smelling like Him

Okay so the day it finally starts getting chilly, I forget my coat. It's raining and cold and I'm wear a T-shirt... Yeah I'm a genius.
I was cold all day long and by 7th period I was practically an icicle. Bob walks up to me like he always does, gave me a hug (cause I was really needed one), and asks how I'm doing, which again is the usual procedure. Well, naturally I told him I was freezing and that I didn't think it would be this cold yet. Then he did something that surprised me... He insisted that I take his jacket and when I asked about him being cold (wearing a T-shirt as well) he said "it's okay, I'm naturally warm blooded."
So I wore his jacket all class period.. And I was warm for the first time since this morning.
Well, when class was over I had to give him his jacket back. Then, he said thanks, I went to tutoring in blue and he went to red.
Have a guy offer you his jacket... Check. (:

Halloweenie Minnie Artist

This must have been the first Halloween that I haven't gone trick or treating. However, I did do plenty of things that I have never done before.
First, I got to hold my friends baby, and I mean baby, brother for more than one minute. (he was a scarecrow and it was adorable.
Second, I went to a Catholic Church. Of course I had to embarrass myself.. Walked the wrong way. Didn't know the words to any of the prayers, didn't know what to do with the whole bread and wine thing. It was a mess. A great experience though. (:
Third, I carved a plumpkin (pumpkin)!! Picture seen above. The only sad part was that my e broke. :( tear..
Fourth, I ate roasted pumpkin seeds. Oh my goodness.. SWEET BABY CHEEZE-ITZ! those were amazing. Yum yum yum (:
And lastly, I painted things on peoples faces!
Yea that is correct ladies and gents (and computers), I the Magpie was at a festival with Songbird for Halloween, and we painted on kids faces. It wasn't that bad at all really. The only thing is that I just got home at like 10:15 or something and I feel like I'm gonna die. I am sooo unbelievably tired right now.
The best part is that I have to finish algebra 2 homework. Ugh kill me now.. Oh and picture retakes are tomorrow. Joy. Well... I better get moving. Happy Halloweenie!! (:

The Crazy Colossal Squid ate my Critique!

The play last night was pretty good. (: I had the most fun during intermission though. Haha I sat in between my two best friends, so it's hard not to have fun.
Dr. Jekel and Mr. Hyde Part 1:
Okay, so the first half of the play went well. Bob decided he would rather sit by me and songbird than evil Ginger and her minions. (not trying to offend the red heads.. She's just really mean and happens to have red hair..) Anywho, we thought we had pick pretty awesome spots, but 2 mins before the show starts this really tall lady sits in front of me, so that I can't see the right side of the stage. Guess who was sitting on my right that I had to get incredibly close to during most of the first half? Bob. After reflecting a tad... I kind of need to apologize to song bird.. I talked to bob quite a bit more. :/ I'm kind of ashamed to admit that I was thrilled whenever his arm accidentally touched mine and stayed there for a good 5 minutes.. And That I seriously wish I could have moved my head down a few more centimeters so that it was resting on his shoulder at one point.. That's only happened once, it last for a few seconds and it will probably never happen again. Sigh..
Intermission: I was picked on by both of my friends basically. Oh! And colossal quids really exist!! :O bob told me so. (: and songbird confirmed it. Guess I wont be swimming in the Arctic ocean anytime soon. ..or was it the Antarctic? I don't remember. Haha.
Dr. Jekel and Mr. Hyde Part Two: the play ended with a twist, songbird and I whispered something important, the people behind us wouldn't shut up, and bob accidentally touch me again. Oh! And it was cold.
I can't really think of anything else to say about last night other than.. It was pretty fun. (:
Going over to Songbird's house later today. (: Will probably apologize then. :/ she'll probably make some comment about bob and me.
I'm think we need to cool the best friends thing just a tad, because I keep getting asked if we're dating. I may talk to him tonight about it.. If it comes up of course. Later bloggers and blogettes!

Rocks on a Grave

Schindler's List is by far one of the best movies ever and I recommend it! Besides scenes with nudity, strong language and massive amount of violence the movie was exceptionally well done. (not that those things made it less amazing.. It was just awkward watching parts with my guy friends..) this is a movie that everyone should watch before they die.
I'd say more, but I must get ready to go to a play tonight with some friends. I may put some jeans on because the PAC is always cold. I would bring a sweater but I kind of want to see if one of my friends will let me borrow theirs.. Don't ask.. It's just a thing of mine. Haha. Sorry it's so short today! Later gators. (:

The Monster that eats my Sweaters

I really wish I had a sweater..

So I'm sitting on the concrete hill thingy by what is basically a ditch and it's pretty chilly outside. I will admit that wearing the black tank top because it makes me look like a bad ___ wasn't one of my more brilliant ideas.
I'm kind of POed right now because my family has turned into a bunch of maniacs and I'm sick of being the scapegoat/Cinderella. All of there crap is pretty much why I just left the house and am now sitting outside in the wind. I personally think that sitting here freezing my butt off is better than the alternative of sitting at home listening to chaos. Plus semi running away for a bit adds to the whole 'everything is my fault' bit. I'll probably go home in a bit and they won't even know I left.
I wish my friends weren't busy, but the fresh Air can be my friend for the time being I guess.
Ugh stupid sweater eating closest monster.

The Fairest!!

Check out this site please and thank you!!! Oh.. and tell me what you think. Still working, but I would say that it is almost done. I would put up content.. but my head is too tired to type anything intelligent.

http:/fairest.webs.com/

Thanks Bloggers, and goodnight!

The Troll

I don't know what movie has done to my family, but I'd appreciate it if it would stop. I don't think my family can handle this quite honestly. At the moment my sister is trying to convince my parents that I'm a bad guy because I asked her to sit in the back of the car. I would have moved to the back, but I am wearing a dress today so that would not have been easy. Then my brother just started crying because he's not sitting next to who he wanted. Finally, my other sister decided that she was going to be angry today for whatever reason. When she got home, I seriously thought the door was going to fall off. Ugh! All of this just to go out and eat at a restaurant. I think I would much rather eat at home or get take out. So... Much easier. My family kills me sometime. I shall have to get back to you later, we have arrived. I'm sure I will have more stories to tell after dinner. Joy..

SUCCESS!!

Just wanted to say really quickly that the post below was todays blog post too. I didn't know how the whole posting a draft thing would work. Sweetness. (:

On October 20, 1947, the notorious Red Scare kicks into high gear in Washington, as a Congressional committee begins investigating Communist influence in one of the world's richest and most glamorous communities: Hollywood.

After World War II, the Cold War began to heat up between the world's two superpowers—the United States and the communist-controlled Soviet Union. In Washington, conservative watchdogs worked to out communists in government before setting their sights on alleged "Reds" in the famously liberal movie industry. In an investigation that began in October 1947, the House Un-American Activities Committee (HUAC) grilled a number of prominent witnesses, asking bluntly "Are you or have you ever been a member of the Communist Party?" Whether out of patriotism or fear, some witnesses—including director Elia Kazan, actors Gary Cooper and Robert Taylor and studio honchos Walt Disney and Jack Warner—gave the committee names of colleagues they suspected of being communists.

A small group known as the "Hollywood Ten" resisted, complaining that the hearings were illegal and violated their First Amendment rights. They were all convicted of obstructing the investigation and served jail terms. Pressured by Congress, the Hollywood establishment started a blacklist policy, banning the work of about 325 screenwriters, actors and directors who had not been cleared by the committee. Those blacklisted included composer Aaron Copland, writers Dashiell Hammett, Lillian Hellman and Dorothy Parker, playwright Arthur Miller and actor and filmmaker Orson Welles.

Some of the blacklisted writers used pseudonyms to continue working, while others wrote scripts that were credited to other writer friends. Starting in the early 1960s, after the downfall of Senator Joseph McCarthy, the most public face of anti-communism, the ban began to lift slowly. In 1997, the Writers' Guild of America unanimously voted to change the writing credits of 23 films made during the blacklist period, reversing—but not erasing—some of the damage done during the Red Scare.

"Congress investigates Reds in Hollywood — History.com This Day in History — 10/20/1947."History.com — History Made Every Day — American & World History. N.p., n.d. Web. 21 Oct. 2010. .

Belated Concert Time

I am writing today a lot earlier than I usually to because I have a choir concert tonight, and when I get back I have a bunch of homework to do.

I'll start with the not so happy news, moving. I almost did not have any moving news today, but I decided to tell my English/History teachers about it. Not fun. I almost did it without crying, but one of the girls in my class overheard me and decided to give me a hug and that's when the tears started. The girl who usually cries in that class made me cry. Kind of ironic.
Anywho, I learned that the subjects we are covering now are flipped from what regular classes are learning. That is good because I will beast the lessons in Oklahoma, but bad because I'll have to learn the other material on my on. Luckily for me my teachers post almost everything you need online and they have blogs where the students and teachers can interact, so I have decided to learn vicariously through the Internet. That should be interesting. Haha we shall see..

1 Day and 4 Hours Later....

Okay, so when I was originally typing up this blog on my phone I was at school waiting for my mother to pick me up. Well, my mother arrived sooner than I thought she would and when I got home I had to get ready for the Fall Concert. After the Fall Concert, which was pretty amazing for a Fall Concert (I sang 11 songs all together and for 2 of the pieces we received standing ovations!), I was starving so my mother and I went to Taco Bell. I ordered a Mexican Pizza (that tasted like a cardboard box) and two tacos (amazing), just in case you were wondering. The concert was over at 8:30 and I didn't get home until around 10. Well.. it takes me about 30 minutes to eat, and other 30 minutes to shower and all of that good stuff, so I really had no chance to finish up this blog. However, I did have time to finish it up now. The only thing is that because it is 11pm, this is no longer an early blog post and I have an hour to finish before I am two days late.

Umm... where did I leave off.. Right! Learning vicariously through the internet. Well.. that pretty much summed up my Tuesday.. sooo... on to today! (:

Wednesday: Today I took A Capella choir pictures and forgot my order form in the car. Luckily I found enough money in my backpack to buy a group shot and my best friend is getting buddy shots, so I thought I was safe. Ha.. nope. As soon as my mother gets home, she freaks. I don't think it was about the pictures though.. I think it's about the move. She has had her panties up in a bunch for the past two weeks. Bleh.. not fun, trust me.

Hmm what else happened today? Umm.. Not much else really.. huh. Well, tomorrow is picture day for Madrigals, so I should probably get some beauty sleep. Don't want to look bad in the only Mads picture I will have.. :/ Sigh..

Night Bloggers!

Break

So.. I did end up going to school, but I'm glad I did. Apparently I missed a ton Friday, so I am happy that I'm not as far behind as I could be. Also my best friends are amazing! They make me so happy. (: I really don't know what I shall do without them.
While on the topic of leaving, absolutely nothing happened moving wise. I still have a ton to pack but I didn't mess with any of that tonight.
Umm.. Fall concert tomorrow night.. Should be okay I guess.. Not much really happened.. I hope I don't end up crying in my English/History class when I tell me teachers. If I do I'm glad my 3 closest friend are with me.
Well, I have matrices to solve. Joy.. Night Bloggers.
Magpie Sandwich!!

Sickly Packer

So I kind of sorta missed school on Friday due a Fever and a stomach ache that was barely anything. Usually on my sick days I watch tv, eat soup and read. However, because we are definitely moving within the next two months, I had to start packing up my stuff. Very sad.. :(
The movers are only taking so much, so that means that I also had to consider what things I would get rid of next weekend at our garage sale. This kind of thing is not easy for me, because just about everything has some sentimental valve and if it doesn't I can usually find a reason to keep it.. I don't understand how anyone can just throw things out and sell their stuff so easily. I kind of envied those people this weekend. :/
Well I'm still not feeling the best, so I may stay home from school tomorrow too. It all depends on how my mother is feeling, and if I have a fever. I think I'm going to go take an ibuprofen or something now. It feels like someone jabbed me in the head with pencils.
I'm going to try to write something everyday, and keep you posted on the move. Keyword: try.
"There is no try only do."- yoda talking to me in my head.
Night bloggers.

When the World Stops

Have you ever had one of those moments where your whole world just stops for a moment and you can't breathe. I always thought that when this happens it was because of something good. Not this time..

I had just come home from my Mock Region Audition. Everything about the audition was perfect, it was my best ever, so naturally I was in a really great mood. Unfortunately that mood didn't last very long. I walk in the door and sit down and I hear those two words...

We're moving...

I feel like the world has just been pulled from under me. Nothing is stable and concrete anymore.. I can't breathe right and nothing is clear through my blurry vision. How am I supposed to study for my PSAT now.. How am I supposed to take that test tomorrow.

Things have just started getting close to perfect. I have been amazingly happy! My grades are great, I'm not worrying about boys, I have amazing friends, the house was just painted, my 16th is coming up, everything was perfect.

Well, I guess I was getting too happy and too comfortable.

We are moving this Christmas Break, no exceptions.. it's just a matter of where we are moving to.. Anchorage, Alaska or Oklahoma City, Oklahoma.. the only upside to this whole thing is that we get to choose.

Ugh! I hate this.. I think I'm just going to defenestrate myself out of the tallest building I can find. Sorry guys but I have to go research up on choirs and school academic profiles... maybe I will be able to see through these blurry eyes.

Operation Ditch Homecoming

Had the greatest night ever last night! Operation Ditch Homecoming was a great success. (: We might need to do that again next year. I personally think that spending around 5 hours with your friends and being able to hear them is a lot better than a dry humping party. Just saying..
Okay so I went with my best friend that might as well be my sister, Bob, and my real good friend who we shall call Knight. (makes sense to me due to the fact I know his actual name. Basically, I went with my 3 closest friends. (: where did we go? Well person who asks questions while reading my blogs, we went to the mall to have dinner, walk around, and watch a movie. I feel like I got so much closer to everyone and that makes me happy. (:
The movie was okay, but sitting by Bob made the two hours or so amazing. (: Ahh friends. My friends are so amazing. They are even cooler and more amazing than the baskin robbin's ice cream I ate that night.
(no this wasn't a double date. We didn't even couple up.. much. :P)
Anywho on the way home I determined two things. First, Knight's shoulder isn't very comfy. Second, Bob's shoulder is extremely comfy. Just saying... Yeah I was stuck in the back in the middle of Knight and Bob.. Definitely not complaining though. (: Just between you and me.. I could have easily fallen asleep in those few minutes I was leaning on Bob's shoulder. Wish he didn't live so close to the mall. :/
Speaking of sleep.. I think that's what I should do now. Night bloggers and blog readers.

Homecoming Spirit Week: 1!!!

Day UNO: Mis-Match (:
I'm not quite sure if I'm going to do anything on this particular day... I kind of got a new dress this weekend that I really want to wear soo.. Sorry spirit week.

Why blog?

"People don't keep journals for themselves. They keep them for other people, like a secret they don't want to tell, but they want everyone to know."

That's what this is right? My online journal. To be honest I write more on this than I would write in a journal. But why do I write? I write because there is an exigency to write. Writing all of this down helps me stay sane and it's also like a written scrapbook for me. I'm horrible about taking pictures.

People need to vent, and the stuff that's not always easy to vent about goes here.

Red-Nosed Magpie

Saturday I went to clean up the nearby beach with my friend and some other people. Did my part for mother nature, collected some neat shells, talked to bob a bit, and overall had a blast. However, I forgot to apply sunblock, so now my nose and cheeks are pinker than the rest of my face and you can see where my watch had been on my wrist yesterday... Yay...
Usually I would not care too much about my tiny burn, but... Tomorrow happens to be picture day at my school. Great. So now I could very well having a peeling nose and cheeks in my yearbook photo. Super de duper. Ugh I knew I was forgetting something. :/
Off to bed before I have I get dark bags under my eyes to go with the rest of my not photogenic face.

ProjectAbHangingPuppies

Ah girble snargle flibby mop gibberish.

I had something I was going to post today... but I was reading this intense book. I just couldn't put it down guys.. sorry. I would try to post something really awesome and maybe interesting now, but I'm really tired and I have a project to finish.. so.. Instead! Here is a picture to make you feel better!

One for the Ladies

When are Kittens not cute?

And if you're not a cat person...

Rant of the Week

I'm sure most of us have taken some sort of survey or test where you get the question asking you what race/ethnicity you are, and you check one of the boxes. What are those for? Why does it even really matter? What if you don't know how to answer that question?
Up until today I have always marked the "White/Caucasian" box, but what does that really mean? Sure my skin is white, but because I'm also Native American would I check that box too? I think I have a little Asian somewhere too, so should I check that box as well? Or maybe I should check other.
It's such an odd question.. And again why does it even matter? Are you just going to use that information to make snap judgements about me? Oh you're white, you have nice clothes, and you lives on the good side of town, so you are probably snooty and mean. Or.. Oh you're black, you live in the ghetto, and you listen to rap music, so you are bad news.
So what?
Did you know that most people know within 3 seconds whether or not they like or don't like some one. 3 seconds! That's insane. Then after you make that decision it takes 20 times for you to change your mind about that one person.
I hated this one girl last year for a while. I had never met her, never seen her, nothing, but I just didn't like her. Now? Now, we are inseparable; best friends for a year now.
I know I'm probably just going on this crazy, confusing rant right now, but this just kind of stick with me today.


I wonder what would happen if I just left that question blank? What do you think?

There's an app for that.

Yesterday I was thinking of ways that I could better manage my time, so that I could blog more. Well, I when I was eating my cereal just a few minutes ago (honey nut oats) an apple commercial came on tv and...

LIGHTBULB!

There's probably an app for that. I checked on the iTunes website thing and sure enough there was this great app (that I am using right now) that is super easy and free. Seriously this app is so amazing. (:
Well I just thought I would let ya know that I got it. I should be able to blog tons more. Yay! Haha I haven't really been doing the best job about posting and stuff but I shall try to improve starting...
Now!

RaNdOm BoRdOmNeSs!!!

The Cure For Bordom Survey
Take This Survey to cure boredom. Have Fun!
1. How old will you be in five years?	20 close to 21
2. Who did you spend at least two hours with today?	My sister Courtney and My pet beta fish Neo
3. How tall are you?	5 feet and 8 inches
4. What do you look forward to most in the next six weeks?	sleepover at my friends house, movies and homecoming dress shopping with my friends, beach clean up on Saturday, and concert Monday night downtown
5. What's the last movie you saw?	Carriers
6. Who was the last person you called?	My mother
7. Who was the last person to call you?	My mother
8. What was the last text message you received?	"Yeah sorry... I fell asleep. I feel really bad now :( I'm really sorry.. I know how rude it is to fall asleep on someone... :/"- Bob
9. Who was the last person to leave you a voicemail?	I haven't had a voicemail since I got my new phone.. but I think it was Ashton
10. Do you prefer to call or text?	calling... texting isn't very personal
11. What were you doing at 12am last night?	sleeping haha
12. Are your parents married/separated/divorced?	married (:
13. When is the last time you saw your mom?	At dinner
14. What color are your eyes?	blue!
15. Do you own slippers?	Yup and they are purple and fuzzy. haha
16. What are you wearing right now?	Showtime T-Shirt and Jeans
17. What is your favorite christmas song?	Carol of the Bells
18. Where is your favorite place to be?	Hawaii.. on the beach (:
19. Where is your least favorite place to be?	My math class
20. Africa-NewZealand-Japan?	uhh New Zealand?
21. Where do you think you'll be in 10 years?	getting married, starting a family, or maybe getting a doctorate degree. I don't really know just yet..
22. Do you tan or burn?	I tan thank goodness
23. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?	Monsters.. specifically the girl in the well tv thing... scary
24. What was the last thing that really made you laugh?	My friend Ashton
25. How many TVs do you have in your house?	Just 3
26. When did u last get in a argument?	Haha I few hours ago?
27. Do you have a laptop or desktop computer?	laptop
28. Do you sleep with or without clothes on?	...with...
29. What color are your walls?	light blue
30. How many pillows do you sleep with?	6
31. What is your favorite season?	Fall! I love it when the leaves change colors.
32. What do you like about fall?	..the colorful leaves.. haha umm my birthday, Halloween, nice weather, Thanksgiving, Homecoming, sweaters, stuff and things.
33. What do you like about winter?	SNOW! and Christmas (:
34. What do you like about the summer?	Swimming, no school, vacationing, the relaxing and bathing suits
35. What do you like about spring?	The flowers, the rain, Easter, school almost being over, and school almost being over
36. How many states have you lived in?	Just One
37. What states have you lived in?	A really cool one
38. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet?	depends.. shoes are nifty, socks are good in cooler weather and barefeet is good on beaches and at home.
39. Are you a social person?	very
40. What was the last thing you ate?	Tuscan Grilled Chicken Sandwhich
41. Have you tried escargo?	Ew.. no
42. What is your favorite ice cream?	A tie between Cookie Dough and Cake Batter
43. What is your favorite dessert?	Ice Cream and Fudge
44. Have you drank a Shirley Temple	a virgin Shirley Temple
45. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich?	anything but grape
46. Do you like Chinese food?	yes
47. Do you like coffee?	yes
48. How many glasses of water, a day, do you drink on average?	umm 3 water bottles worth
49. What do you drink in the morning?	water or orange juice
50. How often do you shower?	every other day
51. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?	sleep on the left and face the right
52. Do you know how to play poker?	not at all

Dear Birds,

I love birds, really I do. My blogger is name is Magpie. Birds are great! Well.. most of them are.. I'm not a big fan of pigeons or seagulls, but all other birds are fine by me. However, when you start tweet tweet tweeting outside of my window at 2 in the morning.. I'm not a huge fan. If I wanted to hear tweeting I would get on twitter. I know I'm not the only one who doesn't care for your pre-dawn concerts, and you should really be sleeping too. How would you feel if I opened my window and started singing some loud opera when you're trying to catch some z's. Basically what I'm trying to say is...

PLEASE SHUT UP!

Thank you.

John Mayer + Owl City = Love

Okay so last night... wait for it... wait for it... drumroll please. (badadabadadabadada)

I WENT TO THE JOHN MAYER CONCERT!!!



Whooooop!! Yay!! (Oh and he was pretty much wearing exactly that haha)

So as you can see I had an amazing time. John Mayer is amazing live and I was in love the entire time. haha
As if going to see him in concert wasn't cool enough, guess who was the opener band. I'll give you a hint.. it's in the Title of this blog. (:

OWL CITY!!!



(He was pretty much wearing that too) Ahhh it was such an experience going to see those guys. Adam Young and John Mayer are simply enchanting and I couldn't have asked for a better first concert.
Yes, that is right boys and girls! I had never been to a concert prior to last night. Really though, I'm glad I waited.



I've thought about who I wanted to see for my first one quite a bit, and I had convinced myself that it would be Paramore. These tickets just kind of appeared (my friend couldn't go, so he sold them to me) and I adore John Mayer so I said HECK YES! I'm really glad I did.

I can't wait to go to school tomorrow and wear my first ever concert T-shirt!! So exciting!! It's blue and it has "It's been a long night in ________." and on the back it has a list of the tour dates. I made sure it had the dates on there. haha I don't really know why I like that so much, but I do so. haha The only thing that could have been better is if they still had the shirt in my size. I am a small and all they had left were Mediums and Larges etc. Oh well, this way I figure I will be able to wear it for quite a while. (:



Well I am going to go to sleep because I am absolutely exhausted. I really need to thank my friend tomorrow. Night bloggers!

Tests!

Ah tests.. This first week of school has been full of them, and that is why I missed a few days. Well, that and I went to my friends birthday yesterday.. haha
I did not post on Thursday because I was insanely busy studying for a test that ended up being extremely easy and for 2 quizzes that I missed due to a doctors appointment.
"But Magpie, why did you have to go to the Doctor?"
Well inquisitive person that reads my blogs, I went to the doctor to get some tests done.
"Yay! More tests!"
Yay...
I have been having some minor annoying problems recently and I went to get the checked out yesterday. They ended up doing an EKG/ECG and then after that they drew blood.. ick. I hate needles and I hate blood, so you can imagine how that went.
My doctor said that the EKG/ECG went fine, but I won't know about the blood tests until Monday. Don't worry, it's not for anything too dreadful.
Do you know what else happens on Monday???
I get my new iPhone 4! AH! I'm soo excited! I've never had an iphone before. (:
Well until tomorrow this has been another post by the Magpie. I love you!! <3

DOOTS and Roller Coasters

Day Three:

Today was soo much better than the first two days of my sophomore year. I feel organized, prepared and very much like an upperclassmen. Not much really that I can say except for that a bowl of doots would be amazing right now. (If you don't know what a doot is, Youtube it and look for the user Olan Something. I found it quite humorous.)
Sooo yeah... keeping it short and sweet today. (:
Sorry if it seems like reading my posts is like being on a roller coasters, but hey, if you don't like it then don't read it. That's just how I roll.
Haha get it? Roll? Yeah.. corny..
And on that note, goodnight fellow bloggers.

The Coming of the Storm

Grr second day of school and already there is practically a war taking place in the school. It's silly really and I don't feel like writing this down, but hey it's my dramatic life and who knows, I could be famous one day and this would be like my diary. It could happen you know. haha
So today I found out that this girl who I thought was my friend is telling everyone that she know that my best friend, who shall forever be known as Songbird, and me are backstabbing liars that you shouldn't be friends with. Yeah.. Super I know.
You may be wondering:
But why would someone do that to their own friend?
I have no idea.. Well there was a stupid little mix-up that happened over the summer, but that wasn't Songbird's or my fault. During the summer I went to this camp for choir and it was hosted at a University so everyone stayed in dorms. Well the girl starting drama now had it in her head that she was rooming with me and got pretty mad when she found out that she wasn't. It's not like it was set in stone.. the people in charge pretty much room you with whoever. So as you can see this whole thing is very stupid.
What really gets me, is that the girl's mom is acting more immature than she is. Every time I have seen her since she has literally turned her nose up and strutted off and whenever I have tried to say hello she gives me a look and walks away. She's in her 30's or 40's and she is acting worse than her 14 year old daughter. It just blows me away.
I do know that I have a good bunch of friends that will stick with me though, and honestly those are the only ones I need. If they really believe that the rooming thing was just Songbird and me being vindictive, and they completely ignore me then they are not that good of a friend.
Wish me luck tomorrow! Ugh! So much drama and I'm not even in theater?!

Back to School

Hey... so that was pretty much me this morning. haha I know I didn't post anything... all summer. I have one word- sorry. I did however keep a summer journal, and that kind of sort of counts right? I'm going to say it does.
Anywho, the first day of school was pretty good. The only thing I hate about the first day is the nerves. I get very anxious the night before and the day of and I just feel odd all day. It's like a bunch of butterflies in my tummy. I would never eat a butterfly... or a caterpillar however. Really though, now that I think about it, if I did eat a caterpillar I think it would die before it could turn into a butterfly.. umm.. yeah.
Right, so anyway, I had a great first day. My schedule is just about perfect and my teachers are amazing. This year, in case anyone was wondering, I am taking:
Algebra 2 Honors
Chemistry Honors
Choir
Smaller group choir
Latin 2 Honors
English Pre-AP
and
History Pre AP
I'm am sooo relieved that I get to take Algebra 2 now.. all of the math teachers that I have ever had have said that it is pretty much the hardest math class ever. All of the other teachers I have ever had also say that Junior year, which is when average people take Algebra 2, is the hardest year of school you will ever have. I have heard that Junior year seriously swallows kids alive... and I really don't want to be one of those kids. I need to have amazing grades this year and that year so that while other people's class rank will be going down, my will move up. I need a good rank to get into the colleges I want to go to. haha
I still cant believe that summer is already over and so is the first day of school.. time just keeps going faster and faster..
Or does it?
Maybe the time speeding up is all in my head..
Time is a man made thing and it can't really move any faster.. yeah it must be in my head.
Anywho, before I get to confused I should probably get ready for bed. It's already 9pm and I am exhausted. Bleh.
I can't wait to go back to school tomorrow! I already know what I'm wearing haha!

Ciao!! <3

Random Late Post

Yeah.. I know it isn't much at all but I wanted to put it ups here..

The letter

I just wrote him a letter. It is 4 in the morning.. I have spent close to 6 hours writing Bob a letter that I plan on giving him if I move.. Which is getting more likely everyday. If I don't move however, I going to have to edit it a bit.
Honestly though I feel a bit better. What really broke me down though was reading aloud with "The Scientist" by Coldplay as my backround music. I actually cried just a bit.. That songs fits pretty well and the actual sound it has is very moving, so that plus a handwritten letter reading equals an emotional me. See in my head he had the letter and was reading it but I was saying everything aloud like in a movie. Also, like in a movie you would see images of him movie and then images of me getting on a plane and flying away to Alaska. It was pretty dramatic haha.
If you're ever irratated at someone try writing them a not telling them how you feel. You don't have to actually give it to them like I'm going to do. Instead of giving them the letter you could burn it, rip it, shred it, flush it down the toilet, whatever suits your fancy.
Ahh I feel so much better (:

Shattered

I officially hope that I end up moving.

Okay, I went to this observatory place.. I guess 2 nights ago now, and so it inspired me and I was going to talk about that. Well things change. I just finished watching Dear John, so like any normal girl who has seen that movie I am not very "stable" at this particular moment. It kind of got me thinking though.. In parts.. It reminded me somewhat of what I dealt with/ am dealing with/ will be dealing with. No, Bob didn't get married, but it's funny cause I did find out he is interested in one of my close friends. Yeah... Super.
It has been months since I have used my myspace account and for some unknown reason I decided to check it tonight. So, I'm looking at everyone's updates and it's talking about how he really likes her.. Like I said, after watching that movie I am in no condition to put up with his junk. I have to see this kid everyday, sometimes twice a day, when school starts back up. Should be fun.
I can't deal with him anymore. The only way I'm going to survive next year is with as little contact with him as possible. He seems to think that we're still bestest buds.. HA! right because nothing at all has happened in the past month. Hmph!
Ugh! I'm just so frustrated! I've already imagined a few Alaskan senarios.. I'll probably just end up being disappointed, but I don't care. Anything there is bound to be better than this.
Goodnight bloggers.

Forever and Always

Thinking Again

I'm a very strong believer in purpose. I like to think that everything happens for a reason, and there's a reason why we meet the people that you do. There are some people though that completely baffle me.. I try to find a reason, but it's not easy.. It's one of those things where I just want to look up to the sky and shout, "Really? Was that really necessary?"
Have you ever wanted to do that. Have you actually done that before?

Is it just me... or do they look like the same person...
I know they are not, because that version of Romeo and Juliet was filmed in 1968, but still.. the resemblance is a tad crazy.
Who know, maybe I'm the crazy one for thinking they look alike. haha Oh well. :)

25 Things!

Okay, so I found this on The Life of an Insomniac blog and I never pass up a good dare. ;)
Let's get started shall we?

1. I hate things that are flavored grape or cherry, but I love eating the fruit.
2. If I had to eat one thing forever it would be pasta. I love Italian food! I guess it's because I'm like 45% Italian.
   
3. I love the rain and I love thunderstorms! It calms me.
4. I only watch one hour of cable a week and that hour is my Glee time.
   
5. I am a tea freak. Not iced tea, hot herbal teas and such.
6. The Phantom from the 1925 version of Phantom of the Opera and clowns scare me..
7. l love just about any shade of blue.
8. My favorite number is 13 and that is how many letters are in my first and last name combined.
9. I would love to go to Merton College in Oxford
10. My dream is to be Galinda or Glinda in Wicked.
    
11. I don't really like Starbucks that much.. Jitters is pretty decent though
12. I'm a sucker for guys who are musically inclined.
13. I am a perfectionist, and my friends think I'm CDO (OCD in alphabetical order)
14. I love shiny things.... a lot.
15. I was a girl scout up until this past year
16. I am CPR certified by the American Red Cross
17. I am a blonde that tans easily and has blue eyes. I love my eyes! haha
18. Audrey Hepburn is AMAZING and I am a HUGE fan. My grandmother told me that I kind of looked like a blonde version of her and so I looked her up and it was love at first sight. I actually met my best friend ever because of her. How to Steal a Million was cute! (:
19. I can be pretty emotional, but I care deeply for others. Whenever I have taken a career survey thingy, a counselor or physiologist is always in the top 5. I love helping other people, it makes me happy. My love for pleasing others though is what usually gets me hurt.
20. I don't really have a religion.. my family just never took me and my sisters to church. I do believe in certain things and what I do believe, I believe very strongly in.
21. I am a klutz.. I will trip over anything and everything.
22. I never swear.. at all. The words just won't come out of my mouth.. it's like there's a Great Wall of China in my mind that prevents the words from leaving. I can't even type the words...
    
23. I fall in love easily and I fall hard
24. Music is the only reason I don't go insane.
25. I don't like violence and wars... but I understand that it is necessary
    

Now that you know my 25 things, it is your turn to do the same if you haven't already.
It's kind of fun and I dare you to do it. :P